Locked Out

Friday 17th February, 2012
I got home from what felt like the longest day of my life to find I had forgotten my house keys and couldn't let myself in.

No problem, I thought, my wife will be home and I'll just ring the doorbell. I rang. Nothing. I rang again. Still nothing. I checked my watch...bathtime! A quick glance at the bathroom window confirmed the light through the cracks in our window shutters.

Oblivious to me being stood on the dark doorstep, my wife was upstairs with my son splashing around in the bath whilst listening to the latest Jessie J album via Spotify. Alright for her, but the volume was so loud she couldn't hear my attempts to attract her attention.

What to do? I sent her an sms message knowing full well that it would fail as she wouldn't take her phone in the bathroom. So I headed back to the car to sit it out, hoping she didn't put Frazer to bed before she came down. Then it struck me...

She was listening to music in the bathroom using our whole house Sonos music system. She takes its splashproof controller into the bathroom with her and Frazer has a boogie whilst splashing in the bath. Maybe...just maybe?

I pulled out my phone and checked that I could connect to the home wifi from outside. The signal was weak, but enough. I then loaded up the Sonos Controller for Android. It worked and I could clearly see Jessie J on the "now playing" screen for the bathroom, and bedroom, and en-suite. No wonder she couldn't hear me, it was blasting out through the entire first floor of the house.

I touched the music button and decided Napster was the best option, as its library is much bigger than Spotify. Search...tracks..."locked out". Within fractions of a second, an unfamiliar Crowded House track appeared from their best of album..."Locked Out". I hit Play Now and hoped it would work.

Indoors, Frazer was no longer in the bath and they were in fact brushing his teeth when the music stopped. At first my wife thought the Virgin Media internet connection had gone down...again...but then the music resumed. But a totally different track, one that wasn't even in the playlist she had created.

The song opened with the line "I been locked out" and she glanced at the controller to confirm it was indeed called "Locked Out". A few seconds later, she opened the shutters, saw me sat in the car on the driveway and came downstairs to let me in...laughing her head off.

Funny, I was just queueing up "Baby it's cold outside".

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